The Spirit of Hogwarts
by geeklizzard
Summary: A Mars Rover Sue, Spirit McCarthy, slashed lightly with Hermione for your amusement and utter disbelief. To be continued!
1. Mission: Out of Control!

Well, it was over. The Great Hall had been splendid, and fortunately Spirit hadn't displayed any embarrassing nervousness when she had to wear the Sorting Hat in front of the whole school. As she confusedly took her seat at the Gryffindor table, between a girl with rather wild hair and a plain-looking, grubby boy who moved over nicely to make room, she felt that all eyes were on her.   
  
"I'm Hermione Granger. This is Ron, and Harry, and that's Neville," said the wild-haired girl, pushing her glasses up on her nose and staring at Spirit. "Are you some kind of magical creature?" Professor McGonagall had given no explanation, other than to ask everyone to help the new student find her classes and settle into school life.   
  
"Thanks, Neville." Spirit noticed that he looked down at his plate shyly. "Actually, I'm not quite sure myself. Usually I'm just a normal teenage girl. I've always had a way with machines, and then THIS happened, and I was on Mars. It's been fun, but I'd like to get back to my real body."  
  
"I guess so. But think of all the advantages of being you. You wouldn't need to really eat, or anything, or sleep. Can you talk to computers? I mean, you could read things at really high speed, couldn't you?" said Hermione enviously.  
  
Spirit smiled. Then she realized her smile wasn't visible, so she cocked her head to the side slightly and nodded cheerfully. Adjusting to a robot body was one thing when she was all alone on Mars, but talking to other people face to face was very different! This was going to take some practice. "It's true. I can take in data and transmit it at very high speeds! And on Mars, I had to wait for commands from Mission Control, and couldn't go very fast. Here, it's amazing, I can move like lightning!"   
  
In front of her suddenly a tray appeared with a small but bright sunlamp. It swivelled and pointed towards her. Its cord and electrical plug trailed behind it like a little tail. Was it her imagination, or was the lamp... happy to see her?   
  
After dinner everyone seemed to be preparing to go off on their own business. Only a few came to stare at her. A handsome blond boy came up and looked her up and down insolently. "Check your oil... Hot Wheels?" He kicked her left front tire as two hulking thugs laughed beside him. Outraged, she drew herself up to her full height, ready to defend herself.   
  
"Don't pay any attention to him, Spirit," said Hermione, scowling. "Come on. I'll show you the Gryffindor dorm.  
  
A few moments later the two girls stood at the base of a huge marble staircase, looking up. Way, way up. "Um," said Spirit. "Is there an elevator?"   
  
"Maybe if we all did levitation spells on you, all at once," Hermione mused. "No, that might be disastrous. You know, this rarely occurs to me, but how about if we go ask one of the professors, or even McGonagall?"  
  
Spirit agreed. They set off down a long maze of corridors, hoping to find a competent adult who would help them.  
  
A mere fifteen minutes later the girls were in the Gryffindor common room, escorted by Professor McGonagall. "We have prepared this small bedroom for you, my dear, just off the common room. It used to be a coat closet. Hermione, perhaps you would temporarily share the room with Spirit until she gets used to life here at Hogwarts. Spirit, here are your books, desk, and schedule for the week. You'll be meeting the Headmaster tomorrow morning."  
  
McGonagall swept out of the room. Spirit shyly smiled at Hermione and then remembered, again, that smiling didn't work very well as she didn't have a mouth. "I hope you don't mind. It was really nice of you to help me," she said.   
  
"I don't mind at all. Hermione said warmly. "Angela snores. And... people can be such idiots around here. Including Ron and Harry! I need a real friend. So, tell me more about Mars, and how you got here."  
  
"I'd love to. Maybe you can help me make sense of this crazy day!" Spirit answered.  
  
Hermione got ready for bed, trying to brush out her hair. "Ow!" she growled as her brush hit a tangle. "It seems like my hair is all tangles these days."  
  
"Don't you have some kind of magic spell for it? Or, you know, some conditioner?" Spirit said. "Here, let me do it. I don't even need a brush, I can use some of my cool extendable tools. You wouldn't believe the things I've got in here." She gently combed out Hermione's hair, her retractable arm gleaming in the lamplight, as they talked about Spirit's problems and what to do next.   
  
Hermione looked pensive. "The horrible thing you saw.. could that have been..." she whispered, "Voldemort?" She quickly explained several books' worth of backstory to the fascinated robot.   
  
"It could be him! Or a dementor. They sound pretty creepy. Do they need oxygen?" Spirit wondered.  
  
"Or, maybe there's life on Mars, or magical life on Mars, or some powerful artifact that you were just about to discover, but for some reason Voldemort couldn't get to unless he possessed your body." Hermione was quiet for a moment. "Spirit? Can I ask you a personal question?"  
  
"Sure, go ahead," said Spirit. "I don't bite." Then she felt kind of stupid since obviously she didn't bite, since she had no mouth. She kept forgetting!  
  
"What were you like... before?"  
  
Spirit sighed. "Just a girl... like you..." her thoughts trailed off as she studied Hermione's graceful body lounging relaxed on the bed, her plaid flannel pajamas stretched attractively over her curvy hips. "Um, what were you saying?"  
  
"Oh... um... I forget..." Hermione muttered distractedly as she was suddenly struck by the gleaming loveliness of Spirit's slender, angled neck, golden winglike solar panels, and tires so black they seemed to carry all the mysteries of the galaxy in their rugged surfaces. Spirit's clear sparkling lenses, as she talked, changed color ever so slightly, iridescent blue, then green and purple, deep as the night... "Oh, um, yeah. Anyway. Do you sleep? I mean, do you need anything? The, uh, bathroom..."  
  
"No, not really." Spirit giggled. "I see they left me some tools and oil and microfiber polishing cloths. I might study a little. If I run out of power before the night's over then I guess I'll sleep."  
  
"Oh, okay. Hey, what's that noise?" Hermione said, sitting up in bed. They both heard an odd clatter from the common room.  
  
Spirit reversed out of the room, folding her panels up as she backed up through the doorway. Out in the common room she saw something very odd. But really, no odder than herself, or talking hats and portraits, or that thing McGonagall had done to get her upstairs.   
  
It was the sunlamp, bouncing on its broad base, cord tail trailing behind. It squeaked at her.   
  
"Hermione?" she called softly. "Are we allowed to have pets?"  
  
"Of course, haven't you met my cat Crookshanks? He's around here somewhere," Hermione said, coming out of the closet. "Oh, how cute!"  
  
Somehow they settled the sunlamp on Spirit's desk. Yawning a little, Spirit began to leaf through her textbooks while Hermione dropped off to sleep. 


	2. Arrival

She woke up in a soft bed between clean white sheets and immediately sat up, or, rather, swivelled her long neck upward and rotated her lenses and main camera. The room was small and cosy, an idyllic hospital room with gleaming four poster wooden beds and stone walls like a castle. There were flowers by her bed, which was made from two mattresses pushed together on the floor.   
  
"Hello?" Spirit yelled. "Is anyone here?"  
  
"Yes - I'm Madame Pomfrey," said a motherly woman reassuringly. "Don't worry about a thing. We had to save you from... from He Who Must Not Be Named, you know, and it took quite a lot out of everyone here. But you'll be fine, and so will they. Are you... hungry, Spirit dearie?" She went to the windows and threw them wide open so that the sunlight came pouring in.   
  
"Yes, thanks," Spirit replied, getting out of bed and rolling over to bask in the sunlight and recharge her batteries. Her lenses felt all gritty, and she extended an arm to brush them gently clean.  
  
"Here, read this letter... it will explain everything," Madame Pomfrey beamed.  
  
HOGWARTS SCHOOL of WITCHCRAFT and WIZARDRY  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
Headmaster: Albus Dumbledore (Order of Merlin, First Class, Grand Sorc., Chf. Warlock, Supreme Mugwump, International Confed. of Wizards)  
  
Dear Ms. McCarthy, We are pleased to inform you that you have been accepted at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry.   
  
Since you will be beginning school in the middle of the term, we will provide all necessary books and equipment.   
  
Your parents have been informed of the recent occurences. Their letter is enclosed.  
  
In the event of any corporeal change of person that should occur, rest assured that the Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry shall do its utmost to return any property of the United States Government to its accustomed location and duties.   
  
Yours sincerely,   
  
Minerva McGonagall Deputy Headmistress  
  
The second letter was in her mother's handwriting.  
  
Dear Spirit,   
  
Don't worry about a thing. Whatever you do, listen to Dumbledore. I'm so sorry that we never told you about your biological parents. Well, sort of biological. We love you so much, more than anything! We are taking good care of your body, honey. Don't try to call us, it might make You-Know-Who suspicious. We'll see you as soon as this all gets sorted out.  
  
Love and kisses,   
  
Mom and Dad  
  
Spirit looked up from the letters. "My what? My biologiÑ" she stopped suddenly, embarrassed. "Witchcraft? Magic? Is that how I got here? Madame Pomfrey, I love robots, and it was great to be on Mars, but can you help me get back into my own body?"  
  
The matronly woman patted Spirit's smooth, strong arm. "I'm sure Professor Dumbledore will be talking with you about that later. Why don't you rest a bit more, for now. You'll have dinner in the Great Hall tonight with the other students."   
  
After Madame Pomfrey had left, Spirit frowned stubbornly. She didn't want or need to rest, now that she'd been in the refreshing sunlight. Her thoughts flew quick as lightning as she considered the possibilities. She tried the doorknob - unlocked! But she realized with a sigh that it was best not to get in trouble on her very first day in this new, strange school, and rolled slowly back to bed to read the mysterious letters again, wondering what they could mean. 


	3. Mystery Letters

She woke up in a soft bed between clean white sheets and immediately sat up, or, rather, swivelled her long neck upward and rotated her lenses and main camera. The room was small and cosy, an idyllic hospital room with gleaming four poster wooden beds and stone walls like a castle. There were flowers by her bed, which was made from two mattresses pushed together on the floor.   
  
"Hello?" Spirit yelled. "Is anyone here?"  
  
"Yes - I'm Madame Pomfrey," said a motherly woman reassuringly. "Don't worry about a thing. We had to save you from... from He Who Must Not Be Named, you know, and it took quite a lot out of everyone here. But you'll be fine, and so will they. Are you... hungry, Spirit dearie?" She went to the windows and threw them wide open so that the sunlight came pouring in.   
  
"Yes, thanks," Spirit replied, getting out of bed and rolling over to bask in the sunlight and recharge her batteries. Her lenses felt all gritty, and she extended an arm to brush them gently clean.  
  
"Here, read this letter... it will explain everything," Madame Pomfrey beamed.  
  
HOGWARTS SCHOOL of WITCHCRAFT and WIZARDRY  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
Headmaster: Albus Dumbledore (Order of Merlin, First Class, Grand Sorc., Chf. Warlock, Supreme Mugwump, International Confed. of Wizards)  
  
Dear Ms. McCarthy, We are pleased to inform you that you have been accepted at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry.   
  
Since you will be beginning school in the middle of the term, we will provide all necessary books and equipment.   
  
Your parents have been informed of the recent occurences. Their letter is enclosed.  
  
In the event of any corporeal change of person that should occur, rest assured that the Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry shall do its utmost to return any property of the United States Government to its accustomed location and duties.   
  
Yours sincerely,   
  
Minerva McGonagall Deputy Headmistress  
  
The second letter was in her mother's handwriting.  
  
Dear Spirit,   
  
Don't worry about a thing. Whatever you do, listen to Dumbledore. I'm so sorry that we never told you about your biological parents. Well, sort of biological. We love you so much, more than anything! We are taking good care of your body, honey. Don't try to call us, it might make You-Know-Who suspicious. We'll see you as soon as this all gets sorted out.  
  
Love and kisses,   
  
Mom and Dad  
  
Spirit looked up from the letters. "My what? My biologiÑ" she stopped suddenly, embarrassed. "Witchcraft? Magic? Is that how I got here? Madame Pomfrey, I love robots, and it was great to be on Mars, but can you help me get back into my own body?"  
  
The matronly woman patted Spirit's smooth, strong arm. "I'm sure Professor Dumbledore will be talking with you about that later. Why don't you rest a bit more, for now. You'll have dinner in the Great Hall tonight with the other students."   
  
After Madame Pomfrey had left, Spirit frowned stubbornly. She didn't want or need to rest, now that she'd been in the refreshing sunlight. Her thoughts flew quick as lightning as she considered the possibilities. She tried the doorknob - unlocked! But she realized with a sigh that it was best not to get in trouble on her very first day in this new, strange school, and rolled slowly back to bed to read the mysterious letters again, wondering what they could mean. 


	4. Friends and Enemies

Well, it was over. The Great Hall had been splendid, and fortunately Spirit hadn't displayed any embarrassing nervousness when she had to wear the Sorting Hat in front of the whole school. As she confusedly took her seat at the Gryffindor table, between a girl with rather wild hair and a plain-looking, grubby boy who moved over nicely to make room, she felt that all eyes were on her.   
  
"I'm Hermione Granger. This is Ron, and Harry, and that's Neville," said the wild-haired girl, pushing her glasses up on her nose and staring at Spirit. "Are you some kind of magical creature?" Professor McGonagall had given no explanation, other than to ask everyone to help the new student find her classes and settle into school life.   
  
"Thanks, Neville." Spirit noticed that he looked down at his plate shyly. "Actually, I'm not quite sure myself. Usually I'm just a normal teenage girl. I've always had a way with machines, and then THIS happened, and I was on Mars. It's been fun, but I'd like to get back to my real body."  
  
"I guess so. But think of all the advantages of being you. You wouldn't need to really eat, or anything, or sleep. Can you talk to computers? I mean, you could read things at really high speed, couldn't you?" said Hermione enviously.  
  
Spirit smiled. Then she realized her smile wasn't visible, so she cocked her head to the side slightly and nodded cheerfully. Adjusting to a robot body was one thing when she was all alone on Mars, but talking to other people face to face was very different! This was going to take some practice. "It's true. I can take in data and transmit it at very high speeds! And on Mars, I had to wait for commands from Mission Control, and couldn't go very fast. Here, it's amazing, I can move like lightning!"   
  
In front of her suddenly a tray appeared with a small but bright sunlamp. It swivelled and pointed towards her. Its cord and electrical plug trailed behind it like a little tail. Was it her imagination, or was the lamp... happy to see her?   
  
After dinner everyone seemed to be preparing to go off on their own business. Only a few came to stare at her. A handsome blond boy came up and looked her up and down insolently. "Check your oil... Hot Wheels?" He kicked her left front tire as two hulking thugs laughed beside him. Outraged, she drew herself up to her full height, ready to defend herself.   
  
"Don't pay any attention to him, Spirit," said Hermione, scowling. "Come on. I'll show you the Gryffindor dorm.  
  
A few moments later the two girls stood at the base of a huge marble staircase, looking up. Way, way up. "Um," said Spirit. "Is there an elevator?"   
  
"Maybe if we all did levitation spells on you, all at once," Hermione mused. "No, that might be disastrous. You know, this rarely occurs to me, but how about if we go ask one of the professors, or even McGonagall?"  
  
Spirit agreed. They set off down a long maze of corridors, hoping to find a competent adult who would help them.  
  
A mere fifteen minutes later the girls were in the Gryffindor common room, escorted by Professor McGonagall. "We have prepared this small bedroom for you, my dear, just off the common room. It used to be a coat closet. Hermione, perhaps you would temporarily share the room with Spirit until she gets used to life here at Hogwarts. Spirit, here are your books, desk, and schedule for the week. You'll be meeting the Headmaster tomorrow morning."  
  
McGonagall swept out of the room. Spirit shyly smiled at Hermione and then remembered, again, that smiling didn't work very well as she didn't have a mouth. "I hope you don't mind. It was really nice of you to help me," she said.   
  
"I don't mind at all. Hermione said warmly. "Angela snores. And... people can be such idiots around here. Including Ron and Harry! I need a real friend. So, tell me more about Mars, and how you got here."  
  
"I'd love to. Maybe you can help me make sense of this crazy day!" Spirit answered.  
  
Hermione got ready for bed, trying to brush out her hair. "Ow!" she growled as her brush hit a tangle. "It seems like my hair is all tangles these days."  
  
"Don't you have some kind of magic spell for it? Or, you know, some conditioner?" Spirit said. "Here, let me do it. I don't even need a brush, I can use some of my cool extendable tools. You wouldn't believe the things I've got in here." She gently combed out Hermione's hair, her retractable arm gleaming in the lamplight, as they talked about Spirit's problems and what to do next.   
  
Hermione looked pensive. "The horrible thing you saw.. could that have been..." she whispered, "Voldemort?" She quickly explained several books' worth of backstory to the fascinated robot.   
  
"It could be him! Or a dementor. They sound pretty creepy. Do they need oxygen?" Spirit wondered.  
  
"Or, maybe there's life on Mars, or magical life on Mars, or some powerful artifact that you were just about to discover, but for some reason Voldemort couldn't get to unless he possessed your body." Hermione was quiet for a moment. "Spirit? Can I ask you a personal question?"  
  
"Sure, go ahead," said Spirit. "I don't bite." Then she felt kind of stupid since obviously she didn't bite, since she had no mouth. She kept forgetting!  
  
"What were you like... before?"  
  
Spirit sighed. "Just a girl... like you..." her thoughts trailed off as she studied Hermione's graceful body lounging relaxed on the bed, her plaid flannel pajamas stretched attractively over her curvy hips. "Um, what were you saying?"  
  
"Oh... um... I forget..." Hermione muttered distractedly as she was suddenly struck by the gleaming loveliness of Spirit's slender, angled neck, golden winglike solar panels, and tires so black they seemed to carry all the mysteries of the galaxy in their rugged surfaces. Spirit's clear sparkling lenses, as she talked, changed color ever so slightly, iridescent blue, then green and purple, deep as the night... "Oh, um, yeah. Anyway. Do you sleep? I mean, do you need anything? The, uh, bathroom..."  
  
"No, not really." Spirit giggled. "I see they left me some tools and oil and microfiber polishing cloths. I might study a little. If I run out of power before the night's over then I guess I'll sleep."  
  
"Oh, okay. Hey, what's that noise?" Hermione said, sitting up in bed. They both heard an odd clatter from the common room.  
  
Spirit reversed out of the room, folding her panels up as she backed up through the doorway. Out in the common room she saw something very odd. But really, no odder than herself, or talking hats and portraits, or that thing McGonagall had done to get her upstairs.   
  
It was the sunlamp, bouncing on its broad base, cord tail trailing behind. It squeaked at her.   
  
"Hermione?" she called softly. "Are we allowed to have pets?"  
  
"Of course, haven't you met my cat Crookshanks? He's around here somewhere," Hermione said, coming out of the closet. "Oh, how cute!"  
  
Somehow they settled the sunlamp on Spirit's desk. Yawning a little, Spirit began to leaf through her textbooks while Hermione dropped off to sleep. 


End file.
